A list of funny quotes from Homer Simpson

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Since lockdown of the 2020 Covid Pandemic, I started watching every episode of the Simpsons from the beginning. Here are some funny quotes from Homer Simpson

  1. "Marge, it takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen."

  2. "I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to Hell?"

  3. "To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems."

  4. "Hey, how come my beer don't have no alcohol in it?"

  5. "I can't believe I ate the whole thing."

  6. "It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to fit in eight hours of TV a day."

  7. "Don't let Krusty's death get you down, boy. People die all the time. Just like that. Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow. Well, good night."

  8. "Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose: it's how drunk you get."

  9. "Marge, don't discourage the boy! Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals! Except the weasel."

  10. "Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way."

  11. "Marge, I'm going to miss you so much. And it's not just the sex. It's also the food preparation."

  12. "I'm sorry, Marge. It's just that, well, I'm an ignorant slob. I thought I could be a farmer, but I was wrong. I'm nothing but a drunken, lazy buffoon."

  13. "Oh, everything's too damned expensive these days. This Bible cost fifteen bucks! And talk about a preachy book! Everywhere I look, 'Thou shalt not.' 'Thou shalt not.' 'Thou shalt not.' It's like they're just trying to give me a guilt complex."

  14. "Marge, you being a cop makes you the man! Which makes me the woman - and I have no interest in that, besides occasionally wearing the underwear, which as we discussed, is strictly a comfort thing."

  15. "Oh, Marge, you're as beautiful as Princess Leia and as smart as Yoda."

  16. "Hey, Marge. I'm a white male, age 18 to 49. Everyone listens to me, no matter how dumb my suggestions are."

  17. "Marge, it's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to fit in eight hours of TV a day."

  18. "Marge, you being a cop makes you the man! Which makes me the woman - and I have no interest in that, besides occasionally wearing the underwear, which as we discussed, is strictly a comfort thing."

"The Simpsons" is a long-running American animated television sitcom created by Matt Groening for the Fox Broadcasting Company. The show follows the life of the Simpson family, consisting of Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa, and Maggie, who live in the fictional town of Springfield.

Homer Simpson is a lazy, overweight, and often clueless father who works as a safety inspector at the Springfield Nuclear Power Plant. Marge Simpson is a homemaker and the patient and understanding wife of Homer. Bart Simpson is the mischievous and rebellious oldest child of the family, while Lisa is the intelligent and politically aware middle child, and Maggie is the youngest member of the family who communicates through sucking on her dummy (pacifier).

The show is known for its clever humour, satirical commentary on contemporary American society, and memorable characters. It has received widespread critical acclaim and has won numerous awards, including, at the time of writing, 32 Primetime Emmy Awards and a Peabody Award. The show has also had a significant cultural impact and has been referenced in a wide variety of media.