Grown-ups are crazy!

Why is it teachers say “pull your socks up!”,
when you’re not even wearing your socks?
Or ask you “where did you last have it?”
If I knew THAT it wouldn’t be lost!

My Dad once said “lift your feet up!”
So I did, and I tripped and fell down.
If bread crust will make my hair curly,
perhaps chocolate will make my eyes brown?

My Gran says I’m young for my age.
Well, I say she’s SHORT for her HEIGHT
And it’s just a bunch of baloney,
that carrots help see in the night.

I’m completely addicted to apples,
but Mum says “They don’t grow on trees!”
And when they say “do you want me to slap you?”
Do they think that I’ll answer “yes please”?

I’m scared to eat greens when it’s mealtime,
‘cause I’d hate to get hairs on my chest.
And I don’t know why Mother bothers, 
to iron my pants and my vest...

“You must ask if you want”, says my Dad.
But my Mum says “I Want, doesn’t get!”
I just don’t know who to believe.
I don’t think they’ve worked it out yet!

My Dad says “You’ll have someone’s eye out!”
If you play with a pillow or stick.
But you can sleep with your face in a pillow,
so is my Dad playing some kind of trick?

So I think that grown-ups are crazy,
When they say all these things so absurd.
It’s not US that should sit here in silence, 
GROWN-UPS should be seen and not heard.